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The Best of the Worst Country and Western Song Titles
(Yes these song titles are actually REAL)
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- Drop Kick Me, Jesus, Through The Goalposts
Of Life
- Get Your Biscuits In The Oven And Your
Buns In The Bed
- Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause
I'm Kissing You Goodbye
- Her Teeth Were Stained, But Her Heart
Was Pure
- How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go
Away?
- How Can You Believe Me When I Say I
Love You When You Know I've Been A Liar All My Life?
- I Been Roped And Thrown By Jesus In
The Holy Ghost Corral
- I Changed Her Oil, She Changed My Life
- I Don't Know Whether To Kill Myself
Or Go Bowling
- I Fell In A Pile Of You And Got Love
All Over Me
- I Flushed You From The Toilets Of My
Heart.
- I Keep Forgettin' I Forgot About You
- I Wanna Whip Your Cow
- I Would Have Wrote You A Letter, But
I Couldn't Spell Yuck
- I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dawg Fight,
Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win
- I'd Rather Have A Bottle In Front Of
Me Than A Frontal Lobotomy
- If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life,
Then Number Two On You
- If Love Were Oil, I'd Be A Quart Low
- If My Nose Were Full of Nickels, I'd
Blow It All On You
- If You Don't Leave Me Alone, I'll Go
And Find Someone Else Who Will
- If You Leave Me, Can I Come Too?
- I'm Just A Bug On The Windshield Of
Life
- I'm The Only Hell Mama Ever Raised
- I've Been Flushed From The Bathroom
Of Your Heart
- I've Got The Hungries For Your Love
And I'm Waiting In Your Welfare Line
- Mama Get The Hammer (There's A Fly
On Papa's Head)
- My Every Day Silver Is Plastic
- My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I
Don't Love Jesus
- My John Deere Was Breaking Your Field,
While Your Dear John Was Breaking My Heart
- My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend,
And I Sure Do Miss Him
- Oh, I've Got Hair Oil On My Ears And
My Glasses Are Slipping Down, But Baby I Can See Through
You
- Pardon Me, I've Got Someone To Kill
- She Got The Gold Mine And I Got The
Shaft
- She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger
- She Made Toothpicks Out Of The Timber
Of My Heart
- She's Got Freckles On Her, But She's
Pretty
- Thank God And Greyhound She's Gone
- They May Put Me In Prison, But They
Can't Stop My Face From Breakin' Out
- Velcro Arms, Teflon Heart
- When You Leave Walk Out Backwards,
So I'll Think You're Walking In
- You Can't Have Your Kate And Edith
Too
- You Can't Roller Skate In A Buffalo
Herd
- You Done Tore Out My Heart And Stomped
That Sucker Flat
- You Were Only A Splinter As I Slid
Down The Bannister Of Life
- You're The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly
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